Saturday, January 5, 2008


2008. What can I say? It is a new year.
I went back to work Jan. 2 it has gone better than I thought. There are people there who are kind. Dad worked there for 10 years so a lot of folks knew him. It has been comforting to get hugs and kind words there. I am grateful. I do feel sorry for the poor unsuspecting that come in my office and tell me they are sorry and ask if dad had been sick. They are then trapped like deer in the headlights as I tell them the story of how the hospital, in essence, killed my father. I will try not to do that so much in the future but I want people to know the true story and not think that dad was sick or gave up or anything. He was ready to come home.

Mom has been trying so hard to put one foot in front of the other. She has bad days but Thursday she went to the grocery store and Friday to the post office. These are huge steps for her to take. My dad did EVERYTHING for all of us. He went to the grocery store every day. Sometimes twice a day. So for mom to go, and to use her brand new debit card, took a lot of courage on her part. I cannot make light of something that is so far out of her comfort level. Me going to the store or movies or work alone is something I have been doing for years. But I think I remember how scary it was when I first had to do it. First lived on my own. But after a while you get a handle on it. It is such an enormous effort to just try. She could be hiding in bed all day, although I assure you I would never allow that to happen, but she gets up and tries to go on. As do we all. Sometimes the bravest thing you can do is get out of bed.

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