Saturday, July 24, 2010

Just Fluff

THE other day my new cousin (wife of old cousin, well not OLD but you get the idea) was posting on Face Book about Marshmallow Creme; also known as Fluff. What the conversation was about is not really that important, talk about whether it was a "Northern" thing. How my "old" cousin had never had it.

Anyway, as I am sitting here today crying over my bills, and trying not to be so scared that I make myself sick, I am trying to think about Fluff.

If you look it up, fluff has many different definitions that don't seem to jive with each other: something of no consequence, a mistake, when an actor flubs his lines, pieces of a junk car that are not metal and cannot be recycled. Those are all so negative!! My favorite definition of fluff is: light & airy, to become fluffy; Soft & light like summer clouds. To move, float, or settle down like fluff. It sounds peaceful and pretty.

Maybe we need to let go of fears and anxiety. Instead of the jitters and tears of not knowing what tomorrow will bring or worrying about how to crawl out of the hole of debt....I think today....I am going to be fluffy. I think I will also eat a peanut butter, Fluff and blueberry sandwhich. Then I am going to settle down like fluff♥

Sunday, July 18, 2010

Disney Movie is Proof I've Done a Good Job

My Son and I are Disney FREAKS! We are not ashamed to admit this. We are proud! Our favorite place in the world is Walt Disney World in Florida. We have taken many vacations to WDW but now due to finances I have no idea when we will get back there. BUT WE WILL BE BACK!! It is our safe haven. Our place to recharge. Our place to calm down.

The only time I was ever sad when I was in WDW was the trip we took right before dad went into the hospital for "the surgery". It was a good trip. Son and I were there for his birthday. Weather was good. Christmas decorations were up. But for some reason there was a sadness I could not shake. There were times sitting on the bus when I was in tears. Maybe I knew. Maybe somewhere inside I knew what was going to happen with Dad. But I have many nice memories of Dad at WDW so that sadness was an isolated, crazy thing like that entire episode of our lives that just creeps into places unexpectedly.

I have been going to WDW since it opened. My grandparents lived in Florida less than an hour from WDW. Ryan's first trip was when he was 6 months old. Disney is in his blood.

Like I said Disney is all over our lives. I do not think that is a bad thing. While I am not too fond of Disney movies lately. I mean The Frog Princess?? Really?? I LOVE the classics. Back when animation was by hand and it was beautiful. That is not to say that everything needs to be done the old fashioned way. I love the Toy Story movies. They are wonderful. And so....comes the meaning of my title.....

Son and I went to see Toy Story 3. There is no one on Earth I would see this with but him. I will not go into reviewing the movie. Let's just say it is emotional and hit us very hard. In the movie Andy is going to college. Son is in college. Andy is giving away his toys. Son HAS those toys. It is about growing up and moving on and love. OHHH it is a good movie. VERY emotional.

At the end of the film I look at my 20 year old son who is in tears. So many tears in fact that he has BOTH hands over his mouth to keep from sobbing out loud. At that moment I KNEW I had done a good job raising this amazing, sensitive young man. In an age of crime and utter callousness, I have a son who cares. Who feels. Who is not afraid to show his emotions. I felt all warm and fuzzy inside. I have done a good job. I have a son who is not afraid to cry at a movie, just like his gramps!