TV & Cell Phones Have Ruined The Theatre

I went to the Theatre with my son Thursday afternoon, I know, Thursday afternoon, but he won the tickets so it was free and a good reason to take a day off. I must preface this by saying I go to a LOT of theatre. My son is a Theatre Major and has been acting since grade school so I see a lot of shows. All I have to say to the masses is SHUT UP! Oh my gosh it is annoying to have people talking during the show. Not WHISPERING mind you but TALKING! I think this stems from TV. You sit in your home and have converstions with the characters on the screen. And that is fine YOU ARE AT HOME! I have laughed and cried and pointed and sighed at my TV. I have screamed at just about everything that Jack Bauer does (goodbye 24) but that is because I am in the privacy of my very own home. Sitting on my sofa. Alone. Not bothering anyone.

It was bad enough with people talking about the folks on the stage as if they were sitting at home watching....oh she sings good, he is so tall, this is what is going on so I will give you a blow by blow description in case you don't understand Honey. But now we have the cell phone! Dah dah da....oh this is awful too. It is one thing that you cannot go to the grocery store without thinking numerous people are asking you a question but they are really on the phone. I have even taken walks around a lake at a county park to enjoy nature only to run into umpteen people talking on cell phones. Now theatre goers check messages during the show...or even have PHONE CALLS during the show.... and at Intermission it is like everyone is on cellphone crack the way they turn on their cell phones! The entire place lights up!
And what about the people who bring in snacks and unwrap candy when the entire theatre is silent? Or crying babies, loud kids....it goes on and on.

Point is.....LIVE THEATRE is happening LIVE. You really are there. And so are hundreds if not thousands of others. Unless this is some rock concert you pretty much should shut up and enjoy! Because the person next to you may have spent $75 for their ticket and they are hanging on every word. No one wants to hear your vibrating phone, half whispered dinner plans, candy wrappers, etc. If you cannot respect the people sitting around you then you need to stay home until this show is made into a movie and released on DVD!

I shall now step off my soapbox and retire to my sofa for some alone TV time. ♥

Religious Tolerance

Shouldn't there be religious tolerance? After all this is the year 2010! But there are still people who feel that what they believe is the ONLY answer. I am floored by things like this! My son was baptized Presbyterian & attended Catholic high school. My beautiful son is the picture of pure tolerance and freedom. My son wants to be a Jew.

I was totally taken aback by a friend when upon learning this fact actually had emailed me:
I think that would totally crush me if my son renounced Jesus as the Son of God. You seem to be taking it well- much, much better than I would. I would be totally freaked out! Oh yeah and she added 4 "wow"s to make a point. Well that was very opened minded of you my friend. Thank you! BLEH! Truthfully, the only thing that freaked me out was HER! I do not even want to imagine what she thinks about same sex marriage or people's right to choose how they live based solely on that person's own right and beliefs and choices! I wonder what she really thinks of ME. After all I got pregnant outside of marriage and raised my son as a single mom! She makes it sound like he wants to become a cannibal or club baby bunnies! He just wants to worship and love. Why would I ever be freaked out by that?

We turned a new century 10 years ago now but I still think there are some out there who would be burning people at the stake for not conforming to what THEY think is right and proper. People have died protecting this country, to make it what it is, a land where everyone is free to believe what they will. And yes, that includes people like my friend who think that only what they believe is the right thing. She has a right to believe what she will but I do not think that is tolerance or peace. I am sad for people like that. Open up your minds and your hearts. After all, Jesus was a JEWISH carpenter ♥

Let There Be Peace

I sit here at 8:30 in the morning and my son is a world away and it is 5:30 in the evening. He has been flying for over 10 hours to get to a place he has dreamed of since he was very young. Israel. The Internet has been a source of information to me about his flight. I can log on and see a little map of where the plane is at this very moment. Or yesterday for both legs of his trip how very late his flights were. The flight from STL to Newark was delayed over an hour due to weather. The flight from Newark to Tel Aviv was delayed over an hour for maintanence. Which just means I have been staring at airline pages for hours the past day. Worrying and praying.

I must make myself stop looking at the Internet and searching for pages of news from Israel. It just makes me crazy. There is unrest in Jerusalem. Of course the last 5 nights of his trip Ryan stays in, yes folks, Jerusalem. Most of the trouble has been at Temple Mount...you know Wailing Wall, Mosques, all the things he has dreamed of seeing. The place they are supposed to spend all day next Friday.

It is all perspective I realize. People can read about awful things happening in North St. Louis and even though I live in St. Louis I that does not mean the bad things are everywhere or widespread or near me. Oh Jesus I love this child. Please keep him safe from all harm.

I need to stay away from the Internet or it is going to make me sick. But I can't. In some insane way it makes me feel like I am protecting him. But I know all the protection is from above. God...and my dad. ♥ I know he is right there taking care of my son. Thanks Dad I know you will do a great job. Please let there be peace.

My Son is Living His Dream.

As I type this my son's plane should be taking off from St. Louis to Newark where he will catch a connecting flight to Tel Aviv and spend his spring break in Israel. He was supposed to take off 50 minutes ago but thanks to the Internet I can tell his fight was delayed.

It is hard to let go and let your kids go off on adventures. Going to Israel is a dream for my son. But as I sit here reading reports on the news about Israel closing the West Bank due to fears of violence and I know that the places they are putting restrictions on include all of the places he is longing to go to next Friday it is hard for a me to just breathe.

How do mothers send their children off to war? How did pioneers do it? How did cavemen women do it? Long ago when your child walked out the front door more times than not the mother never knew what became of them. How did they do that?

My son does not get homesick. He does not travel with a laptop or a cell phone. I will not hear his voice until next Sunday when I pick him up at the airport. Which is 8 days, 208 hours, 12539 minutes and some seconds from now....yes I have it programed into a countdown clock! Who wouldn't? Doesn't everyone do this?

I will be on my knees daily praying for God to protect my son. I will think of him every moment and I will try to breathe. And I will continue to wonder just how a lifetime of mothers watched their children walk out the door and smiled when they sent them off on their big adventures into the world. I will wonder how were they able to hide their tears? ♥

Who is That?!?

Have you ever looked in the mirror, or at your image in a photograph, and wondered...just WHO is that? It is almost scary to not recognize yourself. When did it happen? When did I get old and fat and sad? Where is the smile, the twinkle? Just who is this person who is looking back? Maybe the world would be a better place without mirrors? Some days you walk out of the house and you feel downright cute....maybe even pretty... and confident and awesome...and then you catch a glimpse of yourself in a mirror or a reflection in a window and you stop....hey...who is THAT???!! Then that slow, shocking realization....oh...sadness...that is me! UGH.

Inside I swear I am still the same person I was when I was 16 and running around with my friend Mary. We had a great childhood with no worries. We were young and innocent and clueless..... and we were happy. I guess the more we live the more we live with. Debt and responsibility and worry all pile up and make us weary of life. Some of this aging must be reflected in our outward appearance....that must explain it....that and time. But why then is it that some moments, some rare moments, you can feel the joy and freedom you did when you were younger? Why can't THAT be the reflection that comes back at you?

I guess you just have to live with it. Time marches on and sometimes it looks like it has marched all over you. You can moisturize and brush and paint your self up. Or you can find that inner happiness and light from when you were young and go out feeling THAT beauty and glow....OH....and avoid mirrors!

Valentines Day? Love Always!

Today is Valentine's Day. It is such a silly holiday. It puts pressure on those in relationships and makes those not in relationships feel somehow lowly and sad. It sells tons of candy and cards and flowers to those trying to conform to this silliness. Stop it!! If you save all of your love for one day then who is really the sad one?

I have had a handful of what may or may not have been serious, meaningful "couple" relationships. Looking back I see they were probably more dysfunctional than real. I have had my heart broken. But was it really because I was losing the love of my life or was it more correctly my hurt pride that something I had tried did not work out or the shear disbelief that someone did not want ME!? I think the latter two.

Maybe I have yet to find my soul mate. The love of my life. The ONE! I used to believe the fairytale of happily ever after. The all consuming passion of your love for one man. How your heart beats faster and your soul glows brighter. The little cottage, picket fence love. I clearly have watched too many movies and been to Disney World one too many times.


I am sure my mom had that with my dad. And I know that is why it is so hard for her to put one foot in front of the other each day. It must be such a terrible sadness to have lived the dream and had it torn from you.


As I get older I realize that I do have love. I have passionate, all consuming love. Just not the way I thought I would. I may not have my husband, boyfriend, soul mate. But I have relationships that touch my soul. There are so many and they fill my heart. Too many to even count. But I must touch on .....my son. The love of my life, the center of my world, the joy of my heart. Yes I adore him. He is my only child. How could I ever love anyone as much as I love him? I am so proud of the man he has become. He is caring and loving and respectful and everything I could have ever asked for. He is my love. My family. We are small but mighty. My mom is trying so hard. She is lost and we are trying to find a path for her. It is hard. We are at the age when it is almost like I am the mother and she the child. It is a very hard adjustment for both of us. But I know that she loves me and that makes me glad. My cousin Karla. Well who could ask for someone as wonderful as her?? She is savage! My friends. They are my rock. I have old friends and new friends. Friends who are close to genius and ones who are a little off. I love them all. MT you know you are the dearest to me. You are the only one who can get to the hard places in my heart.

Valentines Day? BAH! Go out and make this day what you will. Maybe you will be lucky enough to get some candy or flowers out of it. Or maybe even a nice dinner. But please, whatever you do, do not make this the only day you show your love. Love is in all forms, in all faces, in all hearts and not just this one day. Happy Hearts ♥ Always.

Ain't No Sunshine.

It is hard to believe that January is almost over. Whew! There ya go. It means that we are that much closer to Spring! I am not a "winter" kind of gal. I do not like being cold. I do not like ice or snow. The sun has not been out in over 2 weeks! They say we may have sunshine this week but it will not last more than a day, if it lasts that long. Why is it that the coldest time of the year is also the most sad and dreary??

It is hard to smile when there is no sun. It is easy to be lazy and tired and clueless this time of year. The demons are darker, the depression is keener. Not that I am crazy depressed or anything...I just mean it is easier to fall into it this time of year.

My dog, the lovely Babette, had an awful eye ulcer. In the past 2 weeks it has cost $400 for her to get well. I have no money. I buy my clothes at Goodwill. I skimp on groceries to try to pay the bills. There are things on my house that desperately need to be fixed but I cannot fix them And let's not even go into the amount of dental work I STILL need even after the $1,000 I have already spent on my mouth. But there was no hesitation when it came to making my dog better. Funny how a little bundle of fur can depend 100% on you taking care of her. It makes you aware that when you take responsibility for a life you need to really mean it. Even if that little life has four legs.

So when it is cold or dark and life is distressing you can look at the little dog and she will trust you completely without question. She knows she cannot do it on her own....she needs your love and care. Maybe it is very good to have a dog in the middle of winter. Maybe we could learn a lesson from them. Maybe every once in a while all we want is someone to take care of us and pet us on the head.